Thankfully, mommas make sure toddlers don’t rule the world. But if toddlers did rule the world…
- Stairs would be replaced with slides.
- The 5-second rule would be extended to 5 days.
- We would all live in tent cities.
- Every book would be declared a coloring book.
- Restaurants would have signs that read, “No Shirt, No Shoes, Service!”
- Animal sounds would become an acceptable, if not preferable, form of human communication.
- Clothing would be optional.
- Snacks would be served 24 hours a day and dessert would be considered a healthy alternative to breakfast, lunch, dinner and second dinner, which would be the most important meal of the day.
- Naps would be banned and only free sleep (the act of naturally falling asleep, such as comfortably in a car seat or face down in a cereal bowl) would be permissible, though still frowned upon.
- Everyone would get a special treat for going potty on the toilet or in a diaper.