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Ep. 6 Bad Advice – featuring comedian Nick Thune

by Chris Cate

nick thune

Comedian Nick Thune is the featured guest in this episode about bad advice. I ask him if he’s ever been told anything completely wrong about parenting, learn how his wife felt when he cut their baby’s hair and discover what he thinks would make a good title for a children’s book. And spoiler alert: it’s something that required me to learn how to bleep out a word.

Links and Items Mentioned in this Episode:

  • www.NickThune.com
  • Nick Thune’s Netflix special Folk Hero
  • Thick Noon
  • Nick Thune on Conan on predicting the sex of his baby
  • Kurt Vile video featuring his dancing toddler

ParentNormal Questions Answered in this Episode:

  • I’ve heard a toddler will go to sleep easier at night if you skip their daytime nap. I need my toddler to go to sleep early this weekend, so should I try keeping him awake through his nap?
  • I am constantly getting advice from grandparents based on old superstitions. Why isn’t there a website like Snopes.com to fact-check their nonsense?
  • How do you politely respond to a friend who gives you advice about raising a toddler when their only experience raising anything is taking care of a dog?
  • What are the worst pieces of advice you’ve heard toddlers give parents?

ParentNormal News in this Episode:

A shocking new poll reveals 97 percent of babies who have been shocked by an electrical outlet do not learn from the dangerous mistake. The poll debunks the insane theory that parents should let their children electrocute themselves so that they learn not to do it again.

In Dover, Delaware, a pregnant mother is taking no chances to make sure she has a baby girl. After being told by her great grandmother that mothers with bad morning sickness have girls, the mother has started licking doorknobs, wearing wet socks in the cold and eating undercooked meals. But so far, friends say she seems only sick in the head. No word yet on whether that means boy or girl.

Meanwhile, the mother of a seven-month-old Minneapolis baby is entering hour number 72 without sleep. The streak nearly ended yesterday when hours of rocking and back-pats finally put her baby to sleep. But as the mother was crawling into her own bed, she remembered she had left her cell phone in the baby’s room. (Never good.) And in a lapse of judgment due to sleep deprivation, she followed her husband’s advice to go back and get the phone, which – obviously – woke the baby and kept the poor mother’s sleepless streak alive. Another 56 hours and she will tie her third longest sleepless streak.

And finally, in Wellington, New Zealand, a father is taking extra care to ensure his baby girl doesn’t get spoiled. At the advice of his friends, he’s decided that he’s going to be firm and isn’t going to give his baby girl everything she wants.

But he has also decided since taking this vow that he will allow his baby girl to borrow everything she wants – a loophole that only took his daughter 30 seconds to negotiate.

About Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

Since this episode was originally released, the show has evolved into Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast. It’s a show that’s for imperfect parents by imperfect parents. Hosted by humorist and imperfect parent of three Chris Cate, every episode breaks down a topic that causes parents to break down, such as putting kids to bed, potty training, the terrible twos, homework, clothing, discipline, cleaning up, cooking for kids, and so on….

By the end of each topic breakdown, parents will hopefully realize they aren’t alone in their struggles and that the craziness all parents go through is actually quite funny when it’s looked at in the right light. After all, the mission of the show is to help parents laugh when they want to cry.

Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Google and Spotify.

Connect with The ParentNormal on Social Media

Connect with all things ParentNormal on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.

Links to popular episodes of Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

  • Dad Stereotypes versus Reality with Simon Holland
  • Raising Teen Boys with Sarcastic Mommy Lisa Munn
  • Toddler Dangers: How to keep toddlers from injuring themselves and you (with Clint Edwards)
  • Clingy Kids with Rachel Sobel
  • Tooth Fairy Duty with Julie Burton
  • The Mess Kids Make with Lauren Lodder

Filed Under: ParentNormal Interviews, The ParentNormal Comedy Podcast Tagged With: baby, podcast, toddler

Ep. 5 Surviving the Holidays – featuring People I Want to Punch in the Throat author Jen Mann

by Chris Cate

JenMann

Bestselling author and mom of two Jen Mann is the featured guest in this episode about Surviving the Holidays, which are the most wonderfully exhausting time of the year.

I ask Jen what inspired her to start a blog called People I Want to Punch in the Throat. We’ll also talk about the pros and cons of lying to kids about Santa and she’ll share how her blog post about the Elf on the Shelf got one million hits in 24 hours and changed her life.

Links and Items Mentioned in this Episode

  • PeopleIWanttoPunchintheThroat.com
  • Jen Mann’s Amazon author page
  • Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Yuletide Yahoos, Ho-Ho-Humblebraggers, and Other Seasonal Scourges

ParentNormal Questions Answered in this Episode:

  • I want to record a quality home video of our family’s Christmas this year, but my kids never act natural on camera except when they’re trying to take the camera away from me. What should I do?
  • Every year around the holidays, I always eat too much and gain too much weight. What’s a good way to stay in shape during the holidays?
  • I can’t help but think family members are trying to send me a message using the presents they give my kids. Am I being paranoid?

ParentNormal News in this Episode:

A family in Rockland, Maine is hoping for a Christmas miracle. This year, the family’s twin toddlers have convinced their parents to set up the family Christmas tree early, which means it will take a Christmas miracle for even one ornament to make it to Christmas Day without being shattered. The family is said to be on pins and pine needles. But they are accepting donations in the form of non-fragile ornaments and wine.

Meanwhile, parents in Naples, Florida are the beneficiaries of an unwelcome Christmas miracle. They are having a white Christmas early in Florida after taking their eyes off of their toddler for 10 seconds, just long enough apparently for their toddler to roll toilet paper across every inch of their house and yard.

Neighbors are still trying to decide whether the incident has caused the parents to go crazy or if they’re just acting in the Christmas spirit. Because rather than disciplining their toddler, who neighbors have nicknamed the Manheim Steamroller, the parents can be seen in their yard making a toilet paper man with a corn cob pipe, a button nose and two eyes made out of coal.

And finally, a new study finds that if 75 percent of a child’s Christmas toys aren’t broken, lost or forgotten a week after receiving them, the child is probably too old to be playing with toys.

About Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

Since this episode was originally released, the show has evolved into Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast. It’s a show that’s for imperfect parents by imperfect parents. Hosted by humorist and imperfect parent of three Chris Cate, every episode breaks down a topic that causes parents to break down, such as putting kids to bed, potty training, the terrible twos, homework, clothing, discipline, cleaning up, cooking for kids, and so on….

By the end of each topic breakdown, parents will hopefully realize they aren’t alone in their struggles and that the craziness all parents go through is actually quite funny when it’s looked at in the right light. After all, the mission of the show is to help parents laugh when they want to cry.

Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Google and Spotify.

Connect with The ParentNormal on Social Media

Connect with all things ParentNormal on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.

Links to popular episodes of Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

  • Dad Stereotypes versus Reality with Simon Holland
  • Raising Teen Boys with Sarcastic Mommy Lisa Munn
  • Toddler Dangers: How to keep toddlers from injuring themselves and you (with Clint Edwards)
  • Clingy Kids with Rachel Sobel
  • Tooth Fairy Duty with Julie Burton
  • The Mess Kids Make with Lauren Lodder

Filed Under: ParentNormal Interviews, The ParentNormal Comedy Podcast Tagged With: author, baby, podcast

Ep. 4 Meltdowns – featuring Reasons My Kid is Crying author Greg Pembroke

by Chris Cate

reasonsmykidiscrying

Reasons My Kid is Crying author Greg Pembroke is the featured guest in this episode is all about meltdowns – something all parents have to deal with, and usually when it’s least convenient.

I ask Greg how pictures of his children went worldwide in a week, leading to an appearance on Good Morning America and a book deal. We’ll find out what toddler meltdown took place on opposite sides of the planet at the exact same time, and Greg will share what happened when one of his toddler’s famous meltdowns was recognized at Disney World.

Links and Items Mentioned in this Episode:

  • ReasonsMySonisCrying.com
  • Get the book Reasons My Kid is Crying (Amazon affiliate link)

ParentNormal Questions Answered in this Episode:

  • My baby has so many meltdowns for no reason it feels like my baby is just playing a terrible joke on me. My baby can’t be as seriously upset as she acts during these meltdowns, can she?
  • What is the threshold of disaster for Sam from Quantum Leap to materialize and handle this meltdown for me?
  • When my 3 year old has a meltdown in public, I don’t want to give into her demands. But I just have to make the meltdown stop, so I cave before it can get worse and bother any more people. Is that a smart idea?
  • I don’t think there’s anything I can do to stop my toddler from having meltdowns every day. It makes me want to give up, which makes me wonder what a world ruled by toddlers who always got what they wanted would look like. What do you think?

ParentNormal News Headlines:

A mom and dad are being hailed as customers of the year in Bowling Green, Kentucky. The distinguished parents received a standing ovation last night as they escorted their crying toddler out of a popular dinner time location.

The applause and standing ovation was a significant shift from the boos and evil eyes everyone had been giving the parents while their toddler attempted to break the record for longest scream, a failed effort despite countless attempts. The parent’s picture can now be seen on the restaurant’s wall of fame – with a note underneath that says, “Do not serve.”

Meanwhile, in Rutland, Vermont, a wedding had to be put on hold after an audience member became so emotional that the bride and groom couldn’t hear themselves speaking. The scene was particularly unusual because the emotional audience member didn’t even know the bride or the groom.

It was a 3-year-old who witnesses say really wanted a teddy bear that was accidently left in the minivan because the 3-year-old’s family was running late and had to hurry in.

Fortunately, after only a one hour delay, the parents of the 3-year-old were able to carry out their tearful boy with the help of several family members. During the delay, the preacher officiating the wedding led a prayer circle to pray for all parents. A special offering after the service also helped raised more than $1,000 to go towards babysitters.

And in tech news: Car manufacturers are developing a new car alarm that will replace the traditional siren with the sound of a screaming toddler. The alarm’s designers believe the sound of a screaming toddler will be much more effective at getting the attention of everyone within a mile of a car-theft and it will have the additional benefit of being so bothersome that thieves will run away before completing their theft.

About Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

Since this episode was originally released, the show has evolved into Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast. It’s a show that’s for imperfect parents by imperfect parents. Hosted by humorist and imperfect parent of three Chris Cate, every episode breaks down a topic that causes parents to break down, such as putting kids to bed, potty training, the terrible twos, homework, clothing, discipline, cleaning up, cooking for kids, and so on….

By the end of each topic breakdown, parents will hopefully realize they aren’t alone in their struggles and that the craziness all parents go through is actually quite funny when it’s looked at in the right light. After all, the mission of the show is to help parents laugh when they want to cry.

Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Google and Spotify.

Connect with The ParentNormal on Social Media

Connect with all things ParentNormal on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.

Links to popular episodes of Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

  • Dad Stereotypes versus Reality with Simon Holland
  • Raising Teen Boys with Sarcastic Mommy Lisa Munn
  • Toddler Dangers: How to keep toddlers from injuring themselves and you (with Clint Edwards)
  • Clingy Kids with Rachel Sobel
  • Tooth Fairy Duty with Julie Burton
  • The Mess Kids Make with Lauren Lodder

Filed Under: ParentNormal Interviews, The ParentNormal Comedy Podcast Tagged With: podcast

Ep. 3 Birth Plans – featuring comedian Nate Bargatze

by Chris Cate

natebargatze

Comedian Nate Bargatze is the featured guest in this podcast episode about birth plans. I ask Nate why he and his wife’s birth plan included traveling from their New York home to Tennessee. We also learn who won the bet about whether Nate would cut his baby’s umbilical cord and find out why parenthood has him walking into doors.

Links and Items Mentioned in this Episode:

  • Nate Bargatze’s Website
  • Full Time Magic

ParentNormal Questions Answered in this Episode:

  • Should I get an epidural?
  • How do you know when it’s time to go to the hospital?
  • What 10 things should be on a father’s birth plan?

And in the ParentNormal News:

In Baton Rouge, Louisiana, an expectant mother is being accused of planning the death of her husband. According to a birth plan she provided the hospital, the instructions include killing her husband if he even thinks about making a sexual joke during the delivery. Friends of the mother say, she knows her husband won’t be able to resist making such a poorly-timed joke, which is why his safety is believed to be in such Jeopardy.

And in Bristol, England, a mother has included soft music, low-level lighting, massage therapy, medicine and a whirlpool bath on her birth plan. The list has her husband concerned she may be trying to have an affair with the doctor. But the mother insists that she is just terrified of the birthing process and wants to relax. When she requested a specific doctor to deliver her baby for her, she meant that she really wants somebody to deliver the baby for her. But unfortunately, doctors insist it is far too late in the process for a surrogate mother.

Meanwhile, a new study reveals that 98 percent of birth plans fail to inform nurses that they will be in awkward birth photos that will be shared on Facebook. The study, conducted by the Water Cooler in the Hospital Cafeteria, found that nearly every photo taken in a delivery room includes a blinking nurse in the background who is too busy doing their job to get out of the picture. In response to the study, nurses just want to know why out of the thousands pictures taken in the delivery room that the pictures posted on Facebook always make them look so awkward.

And finally, a new mother in Bend, Oregon who requested a mirror to watch the birth of her baby says that the mirror spoke to her. She says, during the delivery, the mirror mirror said the unfairest of them all is that men don’t have to go through childbirth.

About Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

Since this episode was originally released, the show has evolved into Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast. It’s a show that’s for imperfect parents by imperfect parents. Hosted by humorist and imperfect parent of three Chris Cate, every episode breaks down a topic that causes parents to break down, such as putting kids to bed, potty training, the terrible twos, homework, clothing, discipline, cleaning up, cooking for kids, and so on….

By the end of each topic breakdown, parents will hopefully realize they aren’t alone in their struggles and that the craziness all parents go through is actually quite funny when it’s looked at in the right light. After all, the mission of the show is to help parents laugh when they want to cry.

Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Google and Spotify.

Connect with The ParentNormal on Social Media

Connect with all things ParentNormal on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.

Links to popular episodes of Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

  • Dad Stereotypes versus Reality with Simon Holland
  • Raising Teen Boys with Sarcastic Mommy Lisa Munn
  • Toddler Dangers: How to keep toddlers from injuring themselves and you (with Clint Edwards)
  • Clingy Kids with Rachel Sobel
  • Tooth Fairy Duty with Julie Burton
  • The Mess Kids Make with Lauren Lodder

Filed Under: ParentNormal Interviews, The ParentNormal Comedy Podcast Tagged With: podcast

Ep. 2 Music to Children’s Ears – featuring bestselling children’s musician Laurie Berkner

by Chris Cate

laurieberkner

Best-selling musician Laurie Berkner, who you’ve probably seen on Nick Jr. singing and playing guitar, is the featured guest in this episode. I ask her what makes a great children’s song. We’ll also talk about how becoming a mother influenced her songwriting and how she keeps the attention of an audience full of excited children for an entire show.

Links and Items Mentioned in this Episode:

  • Laurie Berkner’s Website
  • Laurie Berkner’s Favorite Classic Kids’ Songs

ParentNormal Questions Answered in this Episode:

  • When my toddler is in a public place and is dancing like nobody’s watching, am I wrong to be jealous of how much more liberated he is than me?
  • At what point do I tell my 5 year old that he is just banging things and not playing music?
  • I’ve been singing the same children’s songs for decades, but I still don’t know all of the words. When my kids want me to sing with them, what should I do?
  • I want to teach my toddler music, but he doesn’t want to use any of the instruments we’ve bought him. Can you give me a list of 10 alternatives to instruments that my toddler could use to play music?

And in the ParentNormal News:

A new study released today finds that 9 out of 10 parents would rather be on London Bridge than riding on the bus described in the song ‘Wheels on the Bus.” Participants in the study believed they were much more likely to survive falling into the River Thames than spending two minutes on a bus going vroom, vroom, vroom all through the town with people bouncing up and down, wipers swishing, horn beeping and babies crying. When asked if there was anything that could change their mind, the most common response was – no, but somebody should still install seatbelts on that bus.

Meanwhile, in Brooklyn, New York, there is a Clash in the punk rock community following a decision by several punk rock club owners to promote children’s music at their clubs. The decision was made when the punk rock club owners, who are all dads now, were at a playdate and realized that none of them can tolerate the music coming from stuffed animals. And when one of them mentioned that they sounded just like their own dads talking about punk rock music, they came to the conclusion that nothing is more punk rock than music parents hate, which meant nothing is more punk rock than music coming from the bellies of stuffed animals.

“This is anarchy,” said one punk rock fan who hates the trend. “Exactly.” responded one of the club owners. And in an emotional moment between punk rock father and punk rock baby daughter, the daughter’s hair was shaped into a Mohawk using baby shampoo.

Meanwhile, in Budapest, Hungary, authorities are still searching for This Old Man after accusations that he has been playing knick knack on thumbs, shoes, knees, doors, hives, sticks and more. Police are unsure whether this is breaking any laws, but it is believed to be at a minimum – disturbing the peace. Police expect This Old Man will come rolling home soon, where they will be waiting to question him.

And finally, in tech news, a new jukebox is being developed for children. The jukebox will have 500 buttons for children to push, but developers say the primary selling point for kids is that every button plays the exact same song – because the only thing children love more than pushing buttons is listening to the exact same song again and again and again and again and again and again. No word yet on whether the jukebox will randomly play a song in the middle of the night.

About Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

Since this episode was originally released, the show has evolved into Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast. It’s a show that’s for imperfect parents by imperfect parents. Hosted by humorist and imperfect parent of three Chris Cate, every episode breaks down a topic that causes parents to break down, such as putting kids to bed, potty training, the terrible twos, homework, clothing, discipline, cleaning up, cooking for kids, and so on….

By the end of each topic breakdown, parents will hopefully realize they aren’t alone in their struggles and that the craziness all parents go through is actually quite funny when it’s looked at in the right light. After all, the mission of the show is to help parents laugh when they want to cry.

Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Google and Spotify.

Connect with The ParentNormal on Social Media

Connect with all things ParentNormal on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.

Links to popular episodes of Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast

  • Dad Stereotypes versus Reality with Simon Holland
  • Raising Teen Boys with Sarcastic Mommy Lisa Munn
  • Toddler Dangers: How to keep toddlers from injuring themselves and you (with Clint Edwards)
  • Clingy Kids with Rachel Sobel
  • Tooth Fairy Duty with Julie Burton
  • The Mess Kids Make with Lauren Lodder

Filed Under: ParentNormal Interviews, The ParentNormal Comedy Podcast Tagged With: podcast

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3x Dad. Words in Wash Post, Reader’s Digest, McSweeneys, more. Email or DM me for collaborations. chris@parentnormal.com. My new Etsy shop ⬇️

Chris Cate
Instagram post 17897805490747612 I’m still waiting. 😂😂😂
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #coronavirusmemes #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #socialdistance #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #selfquarantine #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #quarantinememes #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #quarantined #tiredasamother #socialdistancing #coronamemes
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
Instagram post 18189114073023350 For the last several weeks I’ve been watching countless YouTube tutorials and studying everything I can find about making tee shirts to sell. And I’m finally up and running with my own Etsy shop for parents now. 
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These are a few of my first shirts and I plan to be making many more. I hope you’ll check out my shop using the link in my bio. I’d love to know what you think. Thanks!
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #etsyshirtshop #etsygift #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #momclothes #etsyusa #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #marriedlife #parentinghumor #etsyfinds #parentingfail #parentingmemes #etsysale #funnymemesdaily #etsymom #momshirt #funnymomshirt #funnydadshirt #etsyshirt
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
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