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20 Lies You Can (and do) Tell Your Toddler Without Feeling Guilty

by Chris Cate

  1. All of your friends are asleep.
  2. You like your medicine.
  3. I’m not going to tell you again.
  4. The quiet game is fun!
  5. Your show ended already.
  6. I will pull this car over.
  7. We’re out of snacks.
  8. The (insert animal) really likes you.
  9. Mommy and Daddy think vegetables are delicious.
  10. Some fish enjoy “swimming” upside down.
  11. We’ll leave without you.
  12. The playground is closed.
  13. You have to eat all of your food.
  14. Nobody will notice the stain on your shirt.
  15. You’re the best (singer, cook, athlete, artist, etc.) in the world.
  16. We’re almost there.
  17. I already checked your closet for monsters.
  18. Maybe tomorrow.
  19. You don’t want to be late.
  20. Good morning.

Filed Under: Lists Tagged With: toddler

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3x Dad. Words in Wash Post, Reader’s Digest, McSweeneys, more. Email or DM me for collaborations. chris@parentnormal.com. My new Etsy shop ⬇️

Chris Cate
So much tired. 😩⠀
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Credit @mommyowl⠀
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
I don't even like thinking about this. 😱⠀
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Credit /daddydoubts on Twitter⠀
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
This is so much harder to do than you realize. 😂⠀
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Credit @simoncholland⠀
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
Can't be too sure. 😂⠀ .⠀ Credit @thedad⠀ Can't be too sure. 😂⠀
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Credit @thedad⠀
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
I'll never figure out how 'sleep when the baby sle I'll never figure out how 'sleep when the baby sleeps' is supposed to work. 🤦‍♂️⠀
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Credit @lessonsfromtheminivan⠀
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
I usually skip to step 3. 😂⠀ .⠀ Credit /sup I usually skip to step 3. 😂⠀
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Credit /superconfusedd on Twitter⠀
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#parenting #parenthood #momlife #dadlife #kids #baby #preschool #toddler #toddlerlife #toddlerproblems #toddlerstyle #fatherhood #motherhood #momhumor #momprobs #momhustle #funnyparents #momstyle #parentingwin #parentinghumor #parentingquotes #parentingfail #parentingmemes #parenthacks #funnymemesdaily #toddlermom #parentingtips #tiredasamother #parentingblogger #parenting101
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