- Check to see if it’s time to wake up. If not, wake up anyway and immediately tell parents.
- Stain a shirt or couch cushion.
- Clean out a toy box and leave it empty.
- Hide a TV remote control.
- Find a corner to substitute as a bathroom.
- Sneak cereal out of the pantry and pour it into a shoe in case of a snack prohibition.
- Change settings on a phone.
- Get into a losing argument.
- Test weight limit of refrigerator shelves by climbing up and down them. Grab juice box if available. Push milk carton to floor if necessary.
- Take parent for a long walk/run when they are least expecting it.
- Beg for snacks in 15-minute intervals, even if a snack is in hand.
- Continue to test theory that everything is attainable if a meltdown is long enough.
- Wipe nose on a stranger.
- Check the length of a roll of toilet paper.
- Make sure all doors are open at all times, including the front door but especially the bathroom doors.
- Create a wall mural with permanent markers or food.
- Empty a bathtub of water on the floor like the tub is a sinking ship and/or the bathroom floor is on fire.
- Throw a yogurt cup, toothbrush and tantrum.
- Carefully select the sharpest toys and place them where a burglar or anybody walking through the house after 7pm would least expect to step on them.
- Fight sleep like it’s trying to steal your family.
