The theme for the three episodes being released this week is Time After Time. So if you’re lost, you can look, and you will find… well, I don’t know what you’ll find but I’m sure if you’re a parent it’s going to be sticky, gross and old…Time After Time.
Alright, has everyone who is going to get the Cyndi Lauper reference shown their True Colors? Okay, good. Now let’s see what’s in the ParentNormal News about Time:
In St. Louis, Missouri, a mother and father are getting dirty looks from their neighbors because the couple put their toddler in timeout without a good reason. The parents, however, say there was a really good reason – their sanity. They say they were about to lose their mind if they didn’t get a 10 second break, which is the maximum length a toddler will sit in time out. They’ve since begged their toddler to put them in timeout, but the toddler just put them in dinner time.
In a related story, a family in Annapolis, Maryland is redefining snack time. The parents say that since their toddler eats snacks all day long, they are no longer going to have snack time. It will just be referred to as time.
In Sydney, Austrailia, a father is still trying to button his baby’s pajamas. The father has been having a very hard time trying to button the pajamas since taking his baby out of the bath last night. At one point, the father thought he was nearly finished after a three-hour-battle, but he was forced to start over when the baby pooped in her diaper for the sixth time in one day – that was 18 hours ago. The father says he won’t give up, but the baby isn’t going to stop kicking either. We will continue following this story to see how much longer the father will wait before switching to zipper pajamas.
Meanwhile, in Springfield, Massachusetts, a judge has ruled a toddler not guilty of breaking the 5 second rule after eating an M&M found on the floor. The judge said that even though the M&M had been on the floor for perhaps as long as 6 months, the toddler has been led to believe 5 seconds is a really long time, considering she has never heard her parents finish counting to three, not even when she fails to do what they ask.
According to a new study, time really can fly by. Researchers have discovered that time flies when you’re having… the kids spend the day at their grandparent’s house.
This just in on the baby pajama story. The dad is now counting on somebody hurrying up and inventing a time machine before he finishes buttoning his baby’s pajamas, so he can go back in time and kill the person who invented baby pajama buttons.
And finally, a baby has grabbed the sunglasses off her parents’ faces for the 12th time today, as if to make it clear there is never a time when parents are cooler than their kids.
And those are the ParentNormal News Headlines.
About Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast
Since this episode was originally released, the show has evolved into Breaking Down Parenting: A ParentNormal Podcast. It’s a show that’s for imperfect parents by imperfect parents. Hosted by humorist and imperfect parent of three Chris Cate, every episode breaks down a topic that causes parents to break down, such as putting kids to bed, potty training, the terrible twos, homework, clothing, discipline, cleaning up, cooking for kids, and so on….
By the end of each topic breakdown, parents will hopefully realize they aren’t alone in their struggles and that the craziness all parents go through is actually quite funny when it’s looked at in the right light. After all, the mission of the show is to help parents laugh when they want to cry.
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